|"Potato Digger" machine gun, just like grandpa used in the garden.|
|Jefferson Davis inkwell ($3,000)|
|Ancient scuba helmet: $450|
Mrs. B's tardy response is remarkable for its brevity: "No."
So I lower my sights, so to speak, and inquire (gracefully) about purchasing a real inkwell stolen by a Yankee soldier from the residence of Confederate president Jefferson Davis in Richmond. It’s only $3K. Mrs. B’s texted response after I text a photo and explain the historical significance of the inkwell is… well… kinda graceless:
Despondent, I walk the floor in a zombie-like state, looking for something she might OK. Then the morning becomes a blur of pineapple hand grenades; an Englishman showing me cufflinks with a specks of gold inside and a "Gentleman's Magazine" from 1775; a 100 percent original Japanese WWII winter pilot helmet with rabbit fur lining ($625); Nazi flags and faux “potato masher” stick grenades turned into beer keg taps (only 125 bucks apiece); an ancient scuba diving helmet ($450); a woman feeding her kid in a surprising way; a teen saying, “We need to bust a move”; a 20-something telling some geezer, “I get most of my news from Newsmax”; and overhearing some high-testosterone guy in weird glasses saying, “I don’t ever want to get married, I have a condo in Barcelona.”
|Sure, this will stop me.|
And then I see “it.” No, not nudies. It’s my real quarry, a cancelled check from Charles Bronson, the macho actor from the 1970s. It’s among a stack of cancelled checks from such notables as Telly Savalas, Sandra Dee and Tony Danza. Dude wants 35 bucks for the Bronson check. It's a popular seller, he says. But I don’t have the courage to run this past Mrs. B.
I probably need to go.
By the way, those hand grenades are probably gonna look great on somebody's fireplace mantle, especially if they're deactivated.
Let’s keep history alive. 👊
|An early "Gentlemen's Magazine," long before Playboy.|
|Checks of the stars.|
|Someone's going to put these on their fireplace mantle and bad things will happen.|
|German World War I medals.|
|Faux Nazi stick grenades turned into beer keg taps. Yours for only $125 apiece.|
|Toy tankers. Keep them away from the pineapple grenade above.|
|WWII Japansese pilot helmet. Doesn't look safe.|